I worry about my sister Kathy. I now understand a little why my Mom worried as much as she did. Kathy is the middle of five children, I am number 4, we have 2 older brothers and one younger brother. Kathy was diagnosed with brain damage at the age of five, I was 2 and my youngest brother was just 6 weeks. JFK had just been assassinated and my Poppa died of cancer. While I can not imagine how my mom "Dee" felt it must have been overwhelming. The grief for her father, the mourning of a country for a beloved president and the disbelief that a child has a life long disability.
My Mom died of lung cancer 4 years ago. My last words to her, "Mom, I will take care of Dad and Kathy." I have wonderful brothers that are able and willing to help, but as the daughter I feel like I carry the weight and responsibility. There are days that I feel guilty that I am not doing more. There are days that I feel happy that my sister now lives 2 miles away, instead of 4 hours away. There are days that I feel lucky and she smiles. There are days that I wished she lived in a place with her own peeps.
As I write, I realize this is the result of 4 years of grieving for a mother I did not understand. My mother lived with grace and dignity, but did not ask for help, even though she could use a hand.
I am a daughter, a sister, a friend, a wife, a mother, an artist, a lover of life living every day to honor my promise.
Today’s post is part of a brave blogging link-up I’m participating in for Liv Lane's How To Build a Blog You Truly Love e-course. Hope you’ll visit Liv to see and support what they’re sharing – and feel free to jump in, too!